Author: Flower Roberts

Daddy’s Iris and the Vole

| Flower Roberts

My daddy had the most beautiful iris bed I have ever seen.

We both ordered from Cooley’s (now defunct) decades ago.

I divided up my collection, but Daddy constructed a bed just for his dozen types.

Those iris exploded with color for years.

Then they got too crowded, so Daddy and I dug them up. We amended the soil in the bed. Then we bagged up the leftover rhizomes and gave them to Daddy’s friends.

We attached the Cooley planting instructions to each paper bag.

His iris bed looked perfectly spaced and tended. We were looking forward to spring.

Then the cancer came. Daddy could not garden anymore. He could only direct from his chair next to an open window.

During a visit home, I walked up to check the iris bed. The leaves were lying flat on the ground, detached from their half-eaten rhizomes. A vole had been eating my precious Daddy’s precious iris.

I researched solutions, I mixed sharp gravel in with the soil, smashed every tunnel and installed a stake that makes noise. I guess this helped some.

Daddy died in July that year.

I still tend his iris bed. There are signs of a vole despite my efforts.

The iris are blooming again now. Only two are hybrids. The rest are old types that were never planted there.

Maybe Daddy and I missed some seed pods during that terrible time. I do not know.

Let’s Dance and Night Affair bearded iris from Cooley’s

All I know is I feel like I keep losing things of great value no matter how hard I try to prevent it.

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The Perfect Peony

| Flower Roberts

I love all my peonies, but some are more demanding than others.

This one, Krinkled White, asks nothing from me.

I have two. One gets morning sun the other evening sun.

They have both burst into bloom. No feeding, watering or staking.

Krinkled White poeny

The buds blush as they open.

The krinkled petals bounce in the breeze.

I feel pure love for this perfect peony.

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Another Shape Change

| Flower Roberts

The Voodoo Lily has finished its duty.

The top set of warts on the spadix are the male parts.

Deeper down in the funnel-like spathe are the female bumps.

Female buds larger and lighter.

I doubt there will be berries produced despite the appearance of flies.

I do hope for a leaf which will be like a spectacular umbrella.

Stay tuned for Voodoo updates.

FLOW

Reshaping Reality

| Flower Roberts

It seems ridiculous to continue to focus on flowers when one is surrounded by many serious concerns.

Maybe you are a bit irritated by all the flowers and animal cuteness.

If this is so, consider this thought.

We all reshape our reality.

We heat and cool our homes to avoid experiencing the actual temperature. We dress accordingly to avoid extremes.

We ship in tropical food year-round to avoid the bland, local fare. Very few of us grow what we eat. That’s why we are fat.

Women wear make-up and spanks and color hair to hide our actual appearance.

Maybe the more flamboyant and extravagant one seems, the more mundane that person really is.

Maybe planting ten thousand flowers is a way of trying to grow roots in the wrong place.

We must bloom where we are planted. No one loves an unhappy, fussy, needy plant.

So as I share photos of gorgeous, well tended flowers, rest in knowing

that there are weeds much bigger than yours just outside the frame of the picture.

There is always dirt under my nails and my house is never clean.

I share my JOY and hide my pain. That is what all good women do.

We reshape our reality.

FLOW

My Stinky Gift

| Flower Roberts

My garden has exploded with color.

The peonies have popped. The iris have erupted. The phlox are flowering.

But only one plant has my full attention.

Some friends dropped it off in a big pot at my gate. They seemed anxious to be rid of it.

This plant has many names. I will share only the clean ones…Voodoo Lily or Devil’s Tongue.

Its Latin name is Amorphophallus konjac. I will save you the trouble of looking up the translation.

Malformed penis

This is what scientist do to poor, innocent plants. My husband has joined in on the bullying by calling it the ‘Tallywhacker.’

I usually try to avoid everything phallic, but I am fascinated by ‘Mr. Voodoo.’

I will post when the spathe opens to expose the spadix.

Too bad it is not possible to post a scratch and sniff picture on the internet. It is supposed to smell of carrion to attract flies.

This giant has been a welcome diversion from the usual, puny, needy little flowers.

Stay tuned.

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The Last Bowl of Eggs

| Flower Roberts

I decorated just enough eggs to give away before Easter.

Then I realized that I had forgotten to take pictures of them.

So I was forced to make a few more to share on my blog.

This activity is very messy, but it is relaxing.

I shared how to do it in earlier posts. Just search ‘Easter eggs.’

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