I am a good girl because that’s what my Daddy wanted. Well actually he wanted a boy, but I did my best to be a good girl, tomboy, green-thumbed, smart child. I mostly did what I thought I should do.
I continued this as an adult. I aquiesced over and over. I let myself be over-ruled. I went along, especially when I was uncertain.
Paths were taken to please others…and now I am here. In the wrong place, in the wrong life. Counting down the years.
But this year has been too bad to go along with. My parents’ homeplace was sold. The things from my past are scattered with strangers. My soulmate, Sandra, died five weeks after surgery to remove cancer. I injured one hip while awaiting surgery on the other.
I could go on and on here. I won’t. Something changed as I was lying in my bed waiting to walk again. Acquiescing no longer seemed like an option. I wanted to follow my own path, not the “should” breadcrumbs left for me to follow.
Then the Universe stepped in just when I was sinking in the care-giver quicksand.
My good friend, Joyce, sent me a link to a Cheryl Strayed workshop occurring in March near my family’s mountain house. I signed up. Then I figured it would be a good thing to read all things Strayed in preparation. The Universe prepared me by encouraging me to order Tiny Beautiful Things months ago.
So into my life comes Dear Sugar the advice column writer that tells it straight/Strayed.
I am at my sister’s house helping her recover from knee-replacement. It is snowing. I finally have quiet time to absorb what Dear Sugar is saying. Low and behold, she is talking to me, Miss Be Good Do What You Should.
She put in black and white what people who love me were afraid to say. It is time to find my path and quit aquiescing.
I must be strong. I must be brave. I must set a good example for Rose.
Get ready world. Get out of our way.
Thanks Sugar and Joyce and the Universe
FLOWER (in bold)
floweralley 
Best of luck. Charting one’s own course can be very difficult.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks Laurie. Going somewhere is better than nowhere…maybe a trip down the Nile…
LikeLiked by 1 person
You will find strength along the way, within yourself, in the examples of others esp Cheryl Strayed in her book ‘Wild’, a true account of her 1100 miles solo hike along the Pacific coast: inspirational and empowering —
LikeLiked by 1 person
I look forward to being inspired by that badass writer. Maybe she could coach me to quit being the Acquiescence Queen.Thanks John Malone
LikeLiked by 1 person
yes, be prepared for change !
LikeLiked by 1 person
Glad you found this important message. I look forward to hearing about your renewed adventures.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks Rebecca. I am psyching myself up for it. I will relocate and isolate to clean the slate.
LikeLiked by 1 person
One of my favorite quotes is by Marianne Williamson. She said, “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.”
LikeLiked by 1 person
I will hope for the courage and power to move forward. I will not forgive myself otherwise. Thank you Rebecca.
LikeLiked by 1 person
We can make mistakes. But we must continue to become our whole selves and allow ourselves to express our needs.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes. Thanks. I have been overwhelmed by other things for a long time.
Book: Seizure Mama and Rose by Flower Roberts
Ready for a new chapter…alone.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Formidable! 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person