writing

Writing for Non-writers

| Flower Roberts

I have shared many books that I find interesting on both my blogs. This one is about writing for folks who NEED to write. It is not about form, style or getting published. Allison Fallon has a business called Find Your Voice. She helps people write their life’s important stories.

There is real power in taking your recurring thoughts that keep swirling around in your head and writing them down. This helps clarify thinking and get you out of “the maze.”

I am on a long journey of this exact type now. It has been transformational for me to finally face past trauma and unpack the roles of each person, especially me, in order to thoroughly understand what really happened and why it affected me as it did. This is what healing is about.


This book gives good advice about how to get your story on paper and why that will make a difference in your life. This is exactly the book I need to guide me as I start a small writing group.  I will not be their fearless leader, I will be writing alongside them as part of the tribe.


I posted on a community website that if anyone wanted to struggle with me, they are welcome. I am just trying to get my stories down as clearly as possible. This group will be about just getting it done. We will not be editing nor correcting.


If you have hesitated to write about an event that needs to be out of your head and onto paper,  get this marvelous book. It will inspire and encourage you to finally start.

You need to be brave…not perfect.

FLOWER

From Solid to Fluid

| Flower Roberts

My isolation odyssey starts on April Fools Day. This is appropriate since the argument with my dad that changed everything involved my supposedly being made a fool of. This pivotal point in my past was based in love and misunderstanding. My dad was the best person I have ever known. He loved me unconditionally despite the fact that I was another daughter, not a son.

So my past has shifted from rock solid to fluid in the past year. The present swirls with political upheaval and I have let go of my expectations for my future. There is no solid ground to plant my feet on.
I am strangly at peace in my floating, sinking and flinking. It has been a bit freeing not being the pole that others dance around. I am no longer holding down a fort or holding up the sky.

My talisman

I credit this peace to my friend Sandra. We used to use the term adapt like it was our code word. I have felt her with me many times since her death. I brought her framed photo here to keep her in my mind as I swim through the next month or more in isolation to write and change my mind from solid to fluid.

Papyrus card I send to friends hit by waves.

My new talisman is a wave pendant on a necklace and a shirt with the Kanagawa wave on it to remind me that energy moves and change is constant.

Kanagawa wave T-shirt

I may blog through April or I may be silent. Just know I am doing my best to tell three stories of three women from three generations in my family who were prevented from following their heart’s desire for their “own good” and how that turned out for them.

Paternalism is a double-edged sword. Men may be able to make women do what they want them to do, but they cannot make them WANT to do what they want them to do.

FLOW is flowing.

A Writing Adventure

| Flower Roberts

I have spent three glorious days among a tribe of over three hundred writers. Our heroic chief was the wonderfully brave Cheryl Strayed. The setting was a lovely site, The Art of Living Retreat Center in Boone, North Carolina.

This jewel is about a twenty minutes drive from my parents’ mountain house. The views were great, the food was delicious, but what I loved most was the people.

Every person I met had fascinating stories. These writers were from all over the country. They drove or flew here just to learn from an author who is fearlessly honest. She inspired courage over and over as she shared stories of her experiences in life and in writing.

Courage is just what I need as I figure out a new direction for myself. I am beyond grateful for this golden opportunity to meet so many kindred spirits who will now be my friends and fellow writers.

FLOW

Write Away

| Flower Roberts

It is time for me to isolate myself and write away past traumas. I cannot move forward with this load of pain. More is coming and I must adjust and adapt. Like the Junk Bug, I must maintain a balance.


I have done this before. In my first book, I told stories of Rose’s seizures and surgeries and how we navigated through the many trials. I wrote it for other mothers, but it served as a catharsis for me. It is not sad. It is our stories of strength, determination and resilience.

The stories are still coming. I hoped Rose would help write the sequel, but her stroke two years ago has left her in a serious funk. If you follow my other blog,

Should They Look Through Our Looking Glass?

you know I am against enabling and spoiling. These are a way of making a parent feel better because they cannot fix the real problem. It backfires big time. Do not go down that rabbit hole.

Here I go again. Writing away my emotional load. It is how I cope. It is who I am.

FLOW moving forward.

Targets and Tangents

| Flower Roberts

A first draft has a life of its own. I have tried to stay on task with my three targets of this book I am birthing. But tangents keep emerging which take me off to somewhere unintended. These have a pull too strong to ignore. So now I have seven files instead of four: Intro,  Parts 1,2, 3 and Tangents 1,2,3.


This is how I have gotten myself unstuck in the writer’s muck. Who knows? Maybe this will end up being three books or a collection of short stories. I just know that when the spirit catches you…you do what it tells you to do.

Tangents are an important part of the process. I have learned not to ignore the quirky visions and ideas that pop up while writing. Those tangents can completely reorient a project.

I also know to pause and process an event from various angles. Seeing Part 1 from my dad’s point of view made the heated argument rather comical. I cannot imagine how frustrated he was with his brazen daughter. I remember he seemed resigned at the end of that disagreement. I know that feeling in dealing with my own headstrong daughter. Poor Daddy!


Stopping writing is not an option.

FLOW back at her desk

Back at My Desk

| Flower Roberts

I have not worked at my desk in months. I spent the morning decluttering it and being PIBWIB (put it back where it belongs).
My computer has been upgraded. I had to put a new battery and card in my camera. Blogging will be frustating for a bit as I relearn the ropes after such a long absence.

I have been deleting all my social media sites. I did not warn my Twitter/X followers because of trolls. They search across all forms to find you for intimidation purposes. This has only happened once, four years ago. It was maddening to think of such a tactic.


I will be more focused in the future. I am getting rid of sources of chaos and distraction. It’s time to do some serious work with some real folks. I will still be around, just underground. I am sticking with WordPress. They have been dependable.

FLOW